Right now we’re up to our eyeballs in snow and I’m sitting inside the house dreaming about warmer days ahead. I can’t even begin to think about swim suit shopping for myself…my New Years Resolution hasn’t started yet. Just waiting one more week…story of my life. But seriously guys, the swim suit selection for little girls is ON POINT this year. You don’t have to spend a bunch of money on a suit so what does that mean?? You can buy them all. No decisions required. No one does cute, cheap swim like Target. I had a hard time narrowing down my search…they are all so good.

1. Floral 2 Piece  If this came in my size, I’d buy it. I love these suits for the girls in summer. It covers more skin = less sunscreen application. I like applying sunscreen like I like pushing my kids on swings, but let’s get real, they don’t like it either. If I can do anything to speed up the process, they’re in. Plus floral and stripes, are you kidding me right now?
2. Unicorn Flip Flops Get ready to be your kid’s best friend. Last summer the girls got their first flip flops and they were obsessed. Only God knows why. For less than $5, I’m buying a few pair per kid. I feel like only drunk girls and Lincoln are capable of losing shoes, so better safe than sorry.
3. Unicorn Sunglasses Because if my kids saw these on any other kid, they’re likely to snatch them right off their face.
4. Unicorn Cover Up Raise your hand if this sounds familiar: You spend hours at the pool and after promising them popsicles if they get out of the freaking water, they thank you by complaining they’re cold and they don’t want to hold their towel anymore. Cover up time. You’ll want to kill them slightly less.
5. Unicorn Swimsuit Well I have unicorn everything else and this swimsuit is amazing. One shoulder and ruffles, my girls will love this one.
6. Black Gingham Swimsuit This is one of those amazing finds…one that my kids probably won’t even like and will whine every time I MAKE them wear it. But you know what kids, I birthed you and wipe your butt, so you’re wearing this swimsuit for ME.
7. Unicorn Tutu Swimsuit Very much opposite to number 6, this will be the swimsuit my kids will wear until the tutu falls off. And they’d wear it after that if I hadn’t thrown it away. Balance.

If this is the worst blog post you’ve ever read, please excuse me. It’s the alka-seltzer. Back to bed.

Hi Friends! Hope you all had a great holiday weekend. My family traveled to Bozeman, Montana to visit friends, which despite the long drive, was so much fun. We skied, we did the hot springs, we drank lots of beer, ate lots of good food, did some shopping and my kids had some other people to harass besides me. On the drive home, I started feeling lousy…hoping I just drank too much, which is entirely possible and not getting sick. The girls are out of school this week for Winter Break so hoping to lay low the next few days. I wanted to give you guys some quick motivation for your Tuesday morning. Here’s a quick workout for you…easy so no instruction since the thought of taking off my sweatpants is too exhausting.

Every Minute on the Minute for 20 minutes:

10 Burpees

That’s it. Easy and great workout. So just in case you’re not familiar with this type of workout, set your timer for 20 minutes. Every minute, quickly do 10 burpees and you have the remainder of the minute to rest. The quicker you are, the more rest you have. If 10 feels like too much, quit being so lazy and MOVE.YOUR.A$$. JK…do 7 or 8 or whatever feels right for you.

And here’s a quick, healthy meal idea.

Ingredients:

• Trader Joe’s Sirloin Steak Tips
• Sweet Potatoes
• Broccoli
• Blue Cheese
• Brown Rice or Cauliflower Rice

I cook the sirloin tips in a little bit of Coconut Oil, seasoned with Salt, Pepper and Trader Joes Chili Lime seasoning. While the meat is cooking, roast your sweet potatoes (tossed in Olive Oil) in a 425 degree oven for roughly 35 minutes. May have to go longer if you cut your sweet potatoes bigger than mine. Season those with salt, pepper and cinnamon. When your sweet potatoes have 20 or 25 minutes to go, add the broccoli to the oven to roast. When done, add some brown rice or cauliflower rice to your bowl, top with steak tips, sweet potatoes, broccoli and blue cheese. For an extra kick, drizzle the whole thing with Trader Joes siracha ranch. Such a healthy, easy meal that we eat on a regular basis. Enjoy!

 

One.

Hope you all had a Happy Valentines Day!  I’m not a fan of giving or receiving cards, for any occasion, but the homemade ones from the kids are super cute. I mean:

How cute is this? Finally she brings something home worthy of something more than a garbage can. Sidenote: Any one else annoyed with all the “Galentines” stuff posted around? This is one day for my husband to buy me flowers and be extra nice to me and maybe bring me Olive Garden to go (yeah, yeah, I know, but I not so secretly love it) and girls are trying to make this day about friendship? Back off bitches.

Two.

Park City is a beautiful place to live. However, this time of year is the pits. It feels like it will never stop snowing. Ever. Even the groundhog doesn’t give me hope. Evidence: This used to be a patio table. And a deck.

Basically Valentine’s Day is over and I just want to complain. You’re welcome. Summer Please.

Three.

Wine

Maybe it’s my longing for warmer temps…maybe it’s my love for Rose all day everyday…I just wanted to recommend this one for all you Rose lovers. We actually can’t buy it in Utah so I stock up when we’re in Vegas or have someone bootleg it from Texas. It’s usually $9.99, just the right amount of dry, and I can drink the whole bottle without a headache. #winning, #writethatonedown

Four.

I recently ran into H&M. I never find much there for myself, but their little girl’s section always has the cutest things. My kids are obsessed with unicorns and rainbows and they have so much of this stuff. I would link stuff but I swear, H&M online and in store are never the same. After scrolling around their site trying to find this stuff, I was pretty much 100% unsuccessful in finding links but 100% successful in finding 20 other things the girls NEED.

Five.

These gummy candies. Damn you Trader Joes. I wish these things didn’t exist but if I see them again in my Trader Joes, I’m buying all of them. And then I’m buying a safe with a lock that I don’t know the combination to so I don’t eat them all and especially so my kids can’t have them. Sometimes I gotta look out for myself.

Happy Friday Gang! We’re heading to Bozeman, MT for a long weekend with the kiddos. It’s a long drive with 2 kids, so if you never hear from me again, the cause is likely some combination of the above.

Making cookies with kids is always a complete disaster. Between stopping them from eating all the cookies and smearing icing on my drapes, we all nearly kill each other have so much fun with this. The girls feel like they’re helping (they’re not) and we make a bunch of treats to give away to neighbors and friends or send with Dad to work. Because THEY CANNOT STAY HERE. My jeans say so. Pro tip: If you are so lucky as to have a cleaning person, do this the day before they come.

Ingredients

• 2 cups *softened unsalted butter
• 6 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla
• 2 teaspoons almond extract
• 2 heaping cups of sugar
• 6 teaspoons baking powder
• 6 cups flour (might need 7…Utah is high elevation and dry…your dough should be a little sticky

Instructions

1. 1.  Mix wet ingredients with sugar then slowly add baking powder and slowly add flour.
2. Mix well
3. Refrigerate dough for 30 minutes
4. Bake for 6-7 minutes at 375 on a parchment paper lined cookie sheet. I usually take them out at 6 minutes. Do not overcook them.

Cream Cheese Frosting Recipe::

via Barefoot Contessa 

• 1 pound cream cheese *(2 sticks)
• 3/4 pound unsalted butter at room temperature *(3 sticks of 1/2 cubes softened butter)
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 1/2 teaspoon almond extract
• 1 1/2 pounds powdered sugar

Mix everything together in a mixer. When done, divide into bowls and add food coloring and frost away.

Happy Valentines Day! Hopefully your husband doesn’t forget and may your kids shower you with shit you never wanted.

 

Another edition of stuff you can buy without leaving your house! My favorite kind of stuff. In case you missed our last edition, check it out Here.

First up, y’all. We stumbled on this wallet from another blogger and had to give it a try. Both of us own real Louis Vuitton bags, and LOVE them. I wouldn’t trade mine for anything and after years of having one (or 3), I totally feel like it’s a worthwhile investment. I’m not fancy by any stretch of the imagination, but my LV bags are my one thing. Every girl needs one fancy thing right? Anyway, while I’m down to very occasionally (read: Christmas and Birthday and Mother’s Day and Anniversary combined) throw down money for the real deal bag, I’ve never been able to do it for the wallet. Like never really wanted to even. Enter Daisy Rose Bags. The quality of these are AMAZING! Nice zippers, nice material, seriously so good. I love that Daisy Rose bags aren’t cheesy replicas. They aren’t fake branded to be something they’re not. Honestly for stuff like wallets and makeup bags, this is the way to go. We both got the full size wallet but after seeing the quality, I ordered the Makeup Bag and Keychain Wallet too.

Wallet

Next up. It’s no secret I love everything leopard print. I think it’s the most perfect neutral and goes with everything I own. I love my Apple Watch, like couldn’t live without it at this point, but the watch bands from Apple are expensive and just not that cute. I’ve worn solid black for years since I never really loved the colors. My mom got both of us Leopard Print Watch Bands for Christmas, and I haven’t taken it off since. I get so many compliments on this thing and the best part…it’s under $10. Run, don’t walk to get yourself one.

Watch Band

Speaking of leopard print, I can’t mention Amazon without mentioning my Onzie Leopard Tights. I bought these for a Halloween Costume, there was never a better Peg Bundy. Evidence:

But the best part about these is I wear them all the time! They are legit workout leggings, with a high rise and they don’t ride down when I’m working out. Pretty much on par with Lulu leggings but half the cost. Plus the print is so good. Too good maybe. Also a great thing to wear on a fake-out day (workout clothes but no workout). 

Leopard Print Leggings   My Favorite Shirt

Moving on. Oh Sunglasses. I do love you, but for some reason, this grown ass woman cannot take responsibility for you. My least favorite way to end a vacation is saying RIP $200 sunglasses, it was nice knowing you. Because for the life of me, I cannot stop myself from jumping in the water with expensive sunglasses. (#booze) I’ve never lost a cheap pair in my life but the nice ones are swimming with the fishies. If you’ve ever looked at a blog, you’ve seen bloggers everywhere wearing the Karen Walker Super Duper Strength sunglasses. And for good reason…they make me feel like a celebrity. Are they worth $250? Absolutely not. Why do I have them? I’m impulsive, what can I say? But I NEVER wear them because I would need to start taking depression meds if I ever lost them. I found these $10 Lookalike Sunglasses on Amazon for WAY less and you know what, I totally love them. They are ridiculously similar and I can lose like 30 pair before I’m at the price of the Karen Walkers. #whichwilllikelyhappen

$10 Sunglasses   Karen Walker Super Duper Strength

Moving right along. Vitamins

“You are a crazy b!*ch, hormones!” Not Alison, hormones.”-Knocked Up

Don’t you just LOVE hormones??” Yeah, me either. But these Vitamins have literally saved me in that department. These bad boys have the perfect combination of healthy herbs that help stabilize your hormones, keep you balanced and regulate your cycle. I swear by these and they don’t just help with hormones. They’re a daily multivitamin so they boost your immune system, contain probiotics for your gut, and help with stress. (Ummm yasss please…said every mom ever)! And BONUS: you can take these on an empty stomach because they’re made with whole foods. #WINNING

That’s it for this week. Happy Hump Day Gang!

I can’t even begin to tell you how much of my life I have wasted watching random stranger’s try on sessions. It’s a sickness. It’s like I don’t want to…I have 8 million other things I should definitely be doing…I just get sucked in. So laundry, dishes, oil changes…you’re gonna have to wait. This one girl I have never even met just got a bunch of crap from Target and she’s trying it all on and rambling about every.single.thing. WTF is wrong with me?

Sooo, I decided that I love these so much, I’m gonna do them. At places that are reasonable. I once watched this girl go on and on about a dress. And the dress was amazing. And I wanted it, bad. And when I found it, it was like $800. Um yeah, no thanks.  But for 2 seconds I was trying to decide how I was gonna break the news to my husband that I just spent $800 on the world’s most amazing dress. But then I realized those would likely be my last words spoken and for the sake of my children, I moved on. So, promise to only show you stuff that won’t break the bank.

Today’s Fitting Room Diaries is all stuff from American Eagle. This stores comes and goes for me, b/c sometimes I feel like they only make stuff for 15 year old girls. But I gotta say, their stuff is on point right now, for girls of all shapes, ages and sizes. Here’s what I found today.

Camo Favorite T-shirt (not available online yet), Jeans

This camo t-shirt is not yet available online. Run over to your local store if you want to snag it. Here it is in stripe. If it shows up, I’ll link it thru Instagram. I sized up to a Medium for an oversize, slouchy fit. Super soft. These super high waisted jeans are amazing! Love the button front (looks similar to a very expensive pair I own) and sits nice and high, sucking everything in.

Top, Jeans

I’m a sucker for a Band Tee. I feel like they make any outfit look cute and effortless. I have a bunch of them and they deserve a post all their own. This one is super cute though and super reasonable. I’m wearing a small…it runs really big. I would normally size up to a medium in a band tee. Next up these white jeans! I’m pretty excited about these. I’m always on the hunt for a cool pair that are soft but actually feel like jeans. These tick all those boxes. I’m obsessed with the raw hem, the high waist and the holes seem to fall in the right places. Really love these.

Sweatshirt, Jeans

Keeping with my love of Band Tees, this sweatshirt version is super soft, I’m obsessed with Mustard anything and it pulls together an otherwise boring outfit. This would be so cute with cut off shorts too. I’m wearing a medium. Same jeans as before.

Top, Jeans

Another great t-shirt that is totally on trend right now. It looks just like a very expensive version I’ve seen on other blogs. I’m wearing a medium and it comes in black too. I’ll take both please. Total Mom uniform right here.

Sweater, Jeans

I really, really loved this sweater…and I didn’t think I was going to. It’s adorably slouchy, you could totally wear it as a cardigan and it felt like a much more expensive sweater than it is. Loved it with the white jeans. Wearing a medium for a more oversized fit.

Sweatshirt

Let’s get one thing out of the way…I know my daughter looks like a 90 year old mall walker. I’m cool with it. But this sweatshirt…I really loved this so much! It def came home with me. It’s the softest thing ever, oversized in the right way…you could even wear with leggings. Love the red and white. I’m wearing a medium but totally could have gone with a small. Just loved the oversized look which comes in handy when I’m eating all.the.things.

That’s it for now. Hope you’re satisfied with your time suck of the day 🙂

HOW IS IT MONDAY? My love for Mondays does not run deep. Not deep at all. Silver Lining: my kids go to school and I get a little me time. Here’s a quick fun workout you can do at home to kick your week off to a good start.

5 Rounds:

10 Arms Complex: 2 Curls, 2 Tricep Kickbacks, 2 Single Arm Press (per side) ***

20 Thrusters ***

30 Weighted Lunges ***

40 Ab Bicycles ***

*** = 20 High Knees…do this after each movement to get your heart rate up

Head to our instagram stories for an explanation of each movement.

And because we’re fighting off those cupcakes we ate this weekend, here’s my favorite Low Carb pizza recipe. It is seriously so good, you’ll barely miss the real thing. Note: I’ve tried just about every single pre-made cauliflower crust pizza made. The only one I actually really like is the Whole Foods 365 Brand. I highly recommend it.

What you need:

• 1 Store Bought Cauliflower Pizza Crust
• Cherry or Grape Tomatoes: I roast mine at 400 degrees for 20 minutes before assembling the pizza. You could totally skip this step.
• Pesto (I get the Kale Pesto from Trader Joes)
• Marinated Artichoke Hearts (also Trader Joes)
• Shaved Parmesan
• If you need the protein, I’ll add some rotisserie or grilled chicken if I have it. TJ’s has  “Just Chicken” which I usually have on hand for stuff like this.
• Arugala
• Lemon

Basically I roast my tomatoes with a splash of olive oil, spread a thin layer of pesto on my pizza, top with chicken if you’re using, artichoke hearts, and the roasted tomatoes. Cook pizza according to package directions, usually between 8 and 10 minutes. When it’s done, sprinkle on some parmesan cheese, top with arugula and I usually squeeze half a lemon over my arugula. So so good. And it doesn’t even have stuffed crust (which is life by the way).

 

 

 

If your kids are in any form of school, they are usually expected to participate in a Valentines exchange. What on earth did we do before Pinterest? Oh wait, I know…go to Walmart, let the kids pick out some tacky card with Peppa Pig on it, spend $3.99 for the entire box and be done with it. Everyone was happy. But now, Pinterest has screwed us all and my kids always bring home the most creative shit and are like Moooommmm, why didn’t we make our Valentines Day cards like these?? And I’m like well honey, maybe next year when I don’t realize Valentines Day is 2 days away.

Here’s a fun idea for a small class, teachers, bus drivers, whoever really. So cute and actually really easy. And an excuse to run to Target if you’re short on time.

Supplies Needed:

EOS Lip Balm (Here or Here or you can catch 6 packs for sale on Amazon)                                                                                                      Twine (Here in Fuchsia Bubblegum Twist)                                                                                     Hole Punch                                                                                                                                              Free Cards I found Online (I used these but there are a ton of options)                                    Scissors

You just cut out the cards, have the kids sign the back, punch a hole in the top and tie the tag with twine on to the pre-existing hole on the lip balm. Done.

Here’s another fun idea the kids are loving. These little duckies are pretty cheap and you can buy ’em in bulk and this little project looks great and requires minimal effort.

Supplies Needed:

Rubber Duckies (Here and Here or how cute are these)                                                               Twine (Here)                                                                                                                                          Scissors                                                                                                                                                      Hole Punch                                                                                                                                            Free Cards I found on Online (I used these but again, so many options)

So easy. Just print out the cards, have your kids sign them, punch a hole in them, and tie them around the neck of the duck with the twine. Dunzo.

Hope I’ve inspired you to make your own Valentines this year. Your kids will think they’re cool and you’ll feel like a Bad A$$ B!TC$ for sending them to school with these. And all those over achieving, one upper Moms Can.Suck.It. Hope you all have a great weekend filled with family, fun and drinks. Lots and lots of drinks.

 

I’ve rounded up some mostly low cost gift ideas for the man in your life. Valentine’s Day gifts for men are hard y’all, and I’m sure my man would love to have any of these things! I did a Gift Idea for Kids a few posts back so check it out if you haven’t already.

1. Yeti Mug My husband has one of these and it’s the first mug he reaches for when he’s having coffee or whiskey or whatever. And I’m always stealing it. So actually, now that I think about it, maybe he actually needs to get me one for Valentine’s Day.
2. Stanley Flask Because every man needs a flask and this is a super cool, rugged one.
3. Ugg Slippers I know these are on the pricier side, but trust me, sooo worth it. Garrett has had these exact slippers for going on 10 years now and they still look amazing. Plus, he was not a “slipper guy” and he embarrassingly reaches for these things the second he walks in the door.
4. Corkcicle Chillsner In Utah especially, good beer cannot be bought cold. Enter this amazing contraption. My husband is def getting this thing. Basically no matter where you live though, you’d be super cool if you busted this thing out.
5. Socks Between losing them and all the holes (HOW??), Garrett is always needing socks. And he’s practical and would actually appreciate socks as a gift. (Unlike me…don’t even think about it G)
6. Phone Case Well… all of our men have phones and if your kids are anything like mine, burly cases that can be launched across the room are absolutely necessary. I like the dark green and the black.
7. Patagonia Hat This is seriously the BEST hat. We’ve had dozens at this point and it’s Garrett’s go-to hat for all occasions. Plus it looks good on me too, so WINNING. #amiright

I don’t really remember my life before having kids. I also really don’t remember my life before Amazon Prime. In both cases, it’s probably for the better. One time in college I took a beer bong from a guy dressed as a chicken. I also remember a time I drove to 4 different Walmarts looking for Vitamins. 4. Walmarts. In one day. Those were dark times.  Anyway, thank god those days are behind me and I can pretty much have anything dropped at my door in 2 days. Here are a few things we have, we love and we think you’d like to buy. Dear Amazon, you’re welcome.

First up, these amazing, Cheap AF Workout Tanks. Wear ’em to the gym, wear ’em like Macale with booty shorts, the world is your oyster. Love the fit, love the cut. Macale is wearing an XS.

You seriously need this tank in your life.

Next up, a Sports Bra we LOVE! I love a sports bra with a cute back. Would look so cute paired with the tank above. Macale is wearing a small in this one. For less than $20, this bra is legit. We’re already wanting more colors.

Next up these Vitamins are amazing! God did not bless me with mermaid hair (I still need to talk to him about that). In fact, what I got is quite possibly the worst hair ever. It breaks, it doesn’t grow, just all around blah. I started taking these Vitamins a few months ago and I can definitely see a difference. My hair is growing faster and I’m losing way less hair in the shower. And dare I say my hair is almost shiny? Almost. Plus they taste like candy.

For those of us who have to get a workout in at the ass crack of dawn…enter this Momsanity BCAA Powder. It’s too early for me to make coffee and I need something to keep me awake on my drive to whatever class I’m headed to. This stuff wakes me up, gives me energy and I seriously have the best workouts when I’m drinking this stuff. I usually drink half before class and half after. This was recommended to me by a fitness instructor, and I’m at a loss when I run out. The fruit punch flavor is money.

One more. Sorry. I couldn’t recommend supplements without recommending Vital Protein Collagen Peptides. This stuff is tasteless, so I add this to my coffee in the mornings. Sometimes if I forget, I throw it in a smoothie. I won’t bore you with all the benefits of collagen supplements, but as you get older, your body produces less and less on its own. Enter wrinkles. So yeah, aside from many other benefits you can google, it helps to hydrate your skin and reduce wrinkles. And it’s cheaper than botox. Sold.

That’s it for now. Happy Hump Day Friends. Have a glass of wine tonight. Or 2. Or 3. Peace out.